2011 "Liver Life Walk"

On Sunday, June 5, 2011  from 9:30am-12:30pm will be The American Liver Association's   Annual "Liver Life Walk".
This walk is dedicated to liver cancer and liver disease survivors as well as sufferers.

I will be participating in this walk in hopes that some of you may join me. I am unsure if there is an entrance fee but donations can be made.

Please have a heart.. (..haha or a liver) and come join me and thousands of others in support for the cause.

Giving up 1 Sunday won't kill you and you will be doing something great!!

"Liver Life Walk" Homepage

I want someone who..

I want someone who has a heart...I want someone who always cares... I want someone who is true to themselves... I want someone who will love me for me...I want someone who realizes the imperfections of the world and the people in it...I want someone fun...I want someone who does not take you for granted...I want someone who will always be there for YOU no matter the situation...I want someone who is not into themselves..I want someone who does not smoke or drink AT ALL...I want someone who is ALWAYS honest...I want someone who knows sentimental value...I want someone whom I can give all my trust in...I want someone who stands up for themselves...I want someone who does not care about what others think or say...I want someone who doesn't cheat on you...I want someone who can be your friend more then a lover in situations...I want someone who likes to workout...I want someone who is active...I want someone who likes to do fun things like rock climbing...I want someone who does not go to bars and clubs...I want someone who is happy...I want someone who is proud of themselves...I want someone with goals...I want someone who sees the greater things in life....I want someone who likes community service...I want someone who likes animals...I want someone who appreciates the value of going to museums, zoos, aquariums etc.. ..I want someone who communicates...I want someone who isn't the 'typical guy'...I want someone who is close with their family, since I am not...I want someone who is giving....I want someone who is understanding...I want someone who you can feel comfortable and be yourself around...I want someone to make promises they CAN keep...I want someone to rely on when I need it...I want someone who never lets me down....I want someone who enjoys the simple things in life...I want someone who does not think that money is happiness and that money is everything...I want someone who calls and asks how you are feeling when you are sick...I want someone who appreciates the things you have done for them...I want someone who smiles...I want someone who has strength...I want someone who has dignity...I want someone who respects themselves...
...I want someone who doesn't think I'm invisible.


Having been cheated on during a 6yr relationship w/ your first love, you realize that everything you want in a significant other.. was never him. It makes you more aware of the important people in your life who will NEVER let you down.. even right now, during life or death.

Move over Xtina!!!

This is without a doubt one of the most disturbing videos of a child.

Is this considered child pornography??? You decide.

http://therecshow.com/youngest-drag-queen-in-asia-dances-to-burlesque/

This word needs to start having some truth in it..

I asked them to take a pic of my tat at the photo shoot. A word I truly believe in and need in my life.

We can all Clown Around now!

WHAT?? WTF is wrong with this world?

We have a Clown Medical School now. In order to make a hospital experience more relaxing.. we bring in clown doctors now.

I really have no words. Just read the article.

What if a woman is trying to give birth? That baby is going to go right back up in that uterus and never come out!

NY Daily News - Clown Medical School

Valentines Day Massacre 2011

Valentines Day is a crock of poopoo. I do firmly believe that if you love someone, it should be everyday, not one day.Surprise your honey with flowers every once in a while - not just on Feb 14. It keeps the ball rolling! Valentines Day is just another money making excuse, really, it is. Yet, I can't help but feel a little sad on this day when people receive candy and flowers and show love and affection to each other. One way or another, I think we all can relate to that.

Feb. 14, 2011 was also the day of a very dreaded doctor's appointment.

After cancer scare #1, I was diagnosed in mid Oct. with Stage 1 Cirrhosis of the liver (Ironic since I don't drink, I know). It is in the very early stages so there is not much I could do. I was told no vitamins or supplements of any kind and to keep a low salt/low iron diet to slow the progression of the disease. Easy for me.

I still have my pain and 'attacks' as I call them. Still vomiting every now and again as well (not to be gross). One morning, I woke up feeling not as great as I could of felt but fine none-the-less.. until I started vomitting blood (sorry!) Haha...
Anyway, to make a long story short... that day I was then diagnosed with a bleeding ulcer (which comes to no shock to me as I've had MAJOR anxiety the last few months) and NAFLD (Non-Alcholic Fatty Liver Disease)....and a growth on my liver. What else is new? Really?

I don't have many people in my life for support, not even family. I was always verbally and physically abused by my father and brother growing up and even to this day, have not been treated well by men.

This is a time in anyone's life where support and love is needed. If you truly care about someone, you would be there for them. Period. There should never be excuses, especially when someone is going through this type of thing.

I always count on this one person in my life. This person was my rock. The only person I can ever come to for support. Like, I said, men tend to treat me with disrespect and that's exactly what this individual has done. He has put me through utter hell these past few months but keep promising he will be there and that he cares. I fell right into his trap. A guy's trap. A guy's trap in using and taking advantage of girls.I just can't believe I fell into it. I'm usually a lot smarter then that. I just don't believe why people have to lie about things.. the littlest things to. That is wrong with this world, no one can ever be honest. Why do you think I have the word "Trust" tattooed on the back of my neck?
This person PROMISED me (yes, again) that he would be there for my appointment. I was extremely scared and nervous about these results and needed someone to be there. I have this new tendency to pass out and (Megan knows about that! Sorry!) so I just needed support and comfort. Who doesn't?

Did he come? No. His excuse? his dad and brother were sick w/ colds. Um... What exactly does that have anything to do with this? Typically guy - yet, I always fell for it. I should of seen it when I don't ever even get asked how I'm feeling. If you care.. you care.

I can't do that anymore. This person doesn't care about me and I just have to learn to be strong and except that.

Needless to say, this did not help calm my nerves about seeing the doctor. I'm upset, and scared to type more so here is the break down of everything. Let's just hope I can get through it...alone.

Stage 1 Cirrhosis
NAFLD

Hepatocellular Adenoma
Hydatid Cyst (treatment involves chemotherapy)
Pre-Cancerous Liver

I'm not going to dive into what these conditions are exactly. I honestly just don't want to get into. Look it up if you want.

I just got to learn to enjoy life and keep trying to go about my regular routine (which I think I'm doing a good job doing that and hiding the pain)

Don't take people...or life.. for granted.

I'm NOT Cancerous?????

I just realized that according to my blogger.com profile, my astrological sign in Gemini. Um...no, I'm Cancer. Did I type in my birth date wrong?.. No I didn't.

Either blogger.com needs to get it's act together or they truly believe that discovery of "new" astrological signs..
Capricorn - Jan 20 to Feb 16
Aquarius - Feb 16 to Mar 11
Pisces - Mar 11 to Apr 18
Aries - Apr 18 to May 13
Taurus - May 13 to Jun 21
Gemini - Jun 21 to Jul 20
Cancer - Jul 20 to Aug 10
Leo - Aug 10 to Sep 16
Virgo - Sep 16 to Oct 30
Libra - Oct 30 to Nov 23
Scorpius - Nov 23 to Nov 29
Ophiuchus - Nov 29 to Dec 17
Sagittarius - Dec 17 to Jan 20

Wait.. They do!!!

ugh... this world..

http://www.livescience.com/4667-astrological-sign.html

Changing the world..one date at a time

Being single does have its advantages. You don't feel pressured when you go out and you don't need to confront certain people on where you are going, who is going to be there, and what time you would home...although it felt nice to know that at least someone cares.
I never really had that much luck with guys and have only been on 2 REAL dates before (one I really enjoyed  too). Guys were never interested, and I just couldn't figure out why.I would never be asked out and when I took the initiative to ask a guy out..I would get rejected (hey, there is no rule saying a girl can't ask a guy to a movie or dinner! Be strong and independent) I'm smart, funny, pretty, and have good morals and a sense of self-worth. I'm pretty sure "Jersey Shore" as something to do with the decline in actual nice guys and the perception on how girls really are - NOT TRUE.
I'm sure there are some decent men out there, only thing.. you have to date a bunch of 'losers' to get to him....

Then comes that disaster of a night.

Date: Sunday, February 13, 2011
  A good friend of mine had proposed the idea to me of going on a blind date. A mutual interest in professional wrestling is what sparked it (come on, who doesn't watch UFC now?). Any who, I was a little apprehensive about the whole idea. I typically don't do good on dates number one. Number 2, does that not seem a little desperate of someone trying to set you up on a blind date? I was told, yes. Gee Thanks!
  Me being in the hospital for a bit and just pretty much holding it off, I finally agreed to go and meet Dave. Hahaha..I could of saved my time.
  I was to meet him at Buffalo Wild Wings in New Roc City. Of course I was standing outside in the cold for 13 min. before I took it upon myself to get a table. He finally came (..uh ..I mean arrived..) and introduced himself and sat down. What is the first thing he says to me? Jokingly -yet, serious- of course. "Not gettin' any drinks?"
Geez, why does everything have to come to the fact that I don't drink? I always feels it does or is it just me?

Right there, big turn off.

Not much else bad to say about the date. Good conversation and we got along great. Talked about family, jobs, movies.. typical stuff. Although, I do have to mention that he like wrestling when he was a young child, but could care less about it now. The one reason this date was made does not exist. No biggie :)

Here is the "Erin Grrrrnesss" part...

Dinner and dessert were done. Now it was time to go play mini golf - which I love fun dates like that :) I leave to go to the potty (always tingle before you leave) and I come back and he is gone...so is his coat. Wtf? Did I just get ditched? I waited there a little until I realized.. yep, I just got ditched.

How humiliating is that? Being the day before Valentines Day made it even more humiliating for me.I honestly did not think people had the balls to do that. Well, I guess if they did that then they have no balls and is just a pussy ('scuse my french)

I wanted to die. I felt so useless. What happened?  What did I do wrong now? Until I realized, I did nothing at all wrong. Not all dates lead to a second one, but be a man and a gentleman and finish out the night and let it be that. Your mother must of not raised you right if that is how you treat women. Not to mention, my gym has been closed for construction since Dec 20. I have not received a paycheck since. So the $67 tab (which included drinks not ordered by me) I got stuck with didn't make things any better.You could imagine my rage.

According to my friend, Dave wasn't 'feelin' the date. Um, that's your excuse? Again, pussy.

I still can't figure out what the problem is.The only conclusion I can ever get back to (which is a shallow conclusion, but this world IS shallow) is the fact that I don't drink. I always felt I would never get asked out are even invited to hang out with friends and acquaintances because of this. I don't understand why it would be an issue but it's just what I feel.
 I know life is a matter of trial and error. You learn and grow stronger with every experience and know not to make the same mistakes twice. Yet, I still find it incredibly hard to find a date.

I am still upset and dissapointed that the one date I really enjoyed didn't end up they way I would of hoped. I wish that person would communicate to me about this so I know.

I guess lack of communication and pussyness are two of the things I need to watch out for.

Live by this...

Going through major health issues and personal self discovery issues, you can imagine my shock when I received this fabulous fortune in my cookie. Yes, I was eating Chinese food and yes, all I eat is rice.

Of course there is. That is why I have the time to do this.